The Betari BoxThe Betari Box, seen in Figure1, is a model that helps us understand the impact that our own attitudes and behaviors have on the attitudes and behaviors of the people around us.
These behaviors often affect the people around us. They then turn those negative behaviors back on us, and the conflict gets worse.
Although the idea of the Betari Box is quite simple, understanding it can help people learn to recognize when they're stuck in a negative cycle.
Apply This to Your Life
- Remember that your attitude, good or bad, affects everyone around you.
- The next time you're in a negative mood, stop what you're doing. Take a few minutes to assess why you're feeling so negative. Negativity often begins with an insignificant event (like spilling coffee or getting stuck in traffic) and simply gets worse from there. Consciously decide to break out of the cycle by focusing on something positive.
- If a colleague is stuck in a negative cycle, then remember that you have a choice in how you respond. Just because that person is negative to you doesn't mean that you have to be negative back.
- If a team member is persistently grumpy and rude, explore the reasons for that negativity with them. Consider talking about the Betari box, and highlight the consequences of their behavior for team productivity and for their own quality of life.
- It's possible to get into downward spirals where someone is grumpy with you, you get defensive and grumpy back, and so on. Where you see this happen, see if you can agree to "press the reset button", and be pleasant to one-another.
- Practice empathy at work. Empathy can also get you out of a negative cycle once you're in it.